8 Instant Methods to Being Rich and Happy
Our friends determine who we are. (Photo: El Fotopakismo)
When growing up, my mom would be concerned who my friends were. I thought my mom was just being nosy. I’m sure many people reading this had the same situation before.
If you have kids now, you are most likely concerned who their friends are.
The reason for the concern of friends? Sometimes we are not able to explain it without thinking about it, though to put it in words, we are who our friends are.
I’m not saying we’ll only be as good or as bad as our friends, though we’ll be very near their level. Rich people can have poor friends and poor people can have rich friends, though it usually doesn’t mix. If we want to make success inevitable, shouldn’t we associate with the people we want to be like?
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again.
“We are who we are going to be for the rest of our lives after college or high school, except for two things, the people we meet and the books we read.”
I’m definitely going to repeat the important concepts a lot, to reinforce it into my head, and into yours.
I can tell you from my experiences, the friends I’ve had, and the friends my friends had, how similar they were to their friends. The friends who did drugs, their friends usually did drugs. The violent friends, had violent friends. The ambitious friends, had ambitious friends.
I think it is important being a Vagabond to at least have some friends who have done something similar before. They can tell you what works and what doesn’t. My friend recently graduated college, sold and gave away all his stuff and just drove off to a different state (I’ll interview him later).
It is actually very easy to meet these people. I’ve interviewed one named Karol, and he is a great guy writing his adventures, his tips and tricks and so much more.
You can meet a lot of people traveling or even join websites which have similar people. Couchsurfing.org is a great place to check out, there are people all over the world who get together to share their adventures.
The main course of the post though comes from Jen at Millionaire Mommy Next Door. I’ve been following her blog for a while now. Before she talked on TV shows or showed a picture about herself, I absorbed everything she wrote.
Before the housing bust, she sold her house and told people through her blog and to people she knew that renting is a better choice (until certain conditions are met and those conditions were years off at the point).
A lot of people didn’t like what she was writing, though she backed it up with very good data and views, and these same people still said it was a bad idea. In my previous post I said:
“People have envisioned amazing things and they become true while other say they were impossible. Some of these same people still say it is impossible AFTER seeing it possible. Run as fast as you can from these people, they are very toxic.”
I told you to run away from people who still don’t believe after they see the facts, again, run away from these people.
After selling her house at a high point in the bubble and started investing in various ways to have a net worth over one million dollars. Now she doesn’t really need to work and her husband can do whatever work he chooses. She lives with a less consumption lifestyle and the money she has earns through investments is enough for their lifestyle.
To me, Jen fits a great profile for a Vagabond. She is financially independent and thinks for herself. She is one of the people I look up to.
The following content comes from her post “Want To Be Rich And Happy? You NEED To Know This…” Check it out here. I’ve quoted the 8 methods, though I will include my comments about each part. Check out her blog, its one of my favorites.
Here is what Jen said about what you need to know to be rich and happy.
“Even if you learn ALL there is to know about money (how to make it, save it, invest it), if your relationships with others OR YOURSELF are dysfunctional, you will NEVER reach your full abundance potential.”
All of the following items are 8 conscious decisions you have to choose to be rich and happy.
Here are the 8 instant methods.
Here are some of the valuable lessons I’ve learned through the University of Hard Knocks:
We become the company we keep. Like attracts like. Be negative and you’ll attract negativity; be positive and you will attract positive relationships into your life.
The same as I mentioned earlier in the post. It is important to pick the type of people we want to be like in life.
Limit your exposure to toxic people. We all have them – friends, family or co-workers – that seem hell-bent on bringing us down to their level. Immunize yourself from their poison by maintaining healthy personal boundaries. Don’t be a martyr, learn to say no. When someone near you behaves badly, don’t engage with them — walk away if you must. Be a positive role model instead. Perhaps you’ll inspire them (when they are personally ready) by modeling a different, healthier attitude.
The phrase “walk away if you must,” is great. I never thought about just walking away from toxic people, though the results will be amazing.
Saying no is great too. Sometimes we may just waste time with toxic people to pass time and it usually ends up costing more in terms of ambition and attitude.
The last part about inspiring is great as well, I do well to have and portray a healthier attitude.
Envy and jealousy will get you exactly what you don’t want.Acknowledge these feelings, then release them and let go. Compare yourself not to others, but only to your best self.
This is said very well about envy and jealousy. I’ve seen many jealous boyfriends or girlfriends and it usually ends up pushing the other person even further.
I have been intimidated to inaction when I compare myself to others. This is really bad, saying I will fail before I even start because someone is well ahead of me is not a great way to think. Starting to only compare myself to my best self will push me to do better.
Don’t be pressured into humility. Definitions of humble include:
- cause to feel shame; hurt the pride of
- low or inferior in station or quality
- marked by meekness or modesty
These definitions don’t fit with a healthy, positive self-esteem, do they?
I use to be was very humble. Now if you talk to a lot of people I talk to, they would say I’m not very humble. Before I was also very negative and had low self-esteem. Now I’m very positive and have very high self-esteem. Do you notice any differences?
Choose to use different language. The language you use directs your actions and therefore the path your life takes.
- Avoid three dirty little words: try, can’t, and but.
- When someone asks, “how are you?” don’t whine back, “I stepped in dog puke getting out of bed this morning, then I burned my toast, and now I gotta suffer through a dentist appointment…”. Instead, respond with something that is joyfully perfect in your world like, “I just had thee best grilled cheese sandwich for lunch!”
Writing this post, I almost said try a few times, just like other posts. I consciously remove the word try from my vocabulary unless I’m trying (yea I said it) to make a point. When I try, I fail. I also avoid the words can’t and but consciously.
If language helps determine action, action helps determine feelings. I use to be a person who let my feelings determine my actions (when I was more humble), now I let myactions determine my feelings. I take action and move forward in my life and feel great everyday.
Limit your exposure to mass media. Pull the plug on bad news. Be selective – record uplifting, humorous and educational programs and keep the boob-tube turned off otherwise. I don’t know who was murdered, what poor child was abducted and from where, and who blew up how many people today, and you know what? I don’t want to know!
I’ve tried a media fast for many weeks before. I now avoid any newspaper and news articles. I don’t watch television, or even very many movies (unless I’m hanging out with a girl, yea). I’ll tell you my mind is more clear and my world is up beat and happy.
My step dad watches the news a lot and it pisses him off. He keeps watching and it keeps pissing him off.
A lot of things on the news we can’t change, so why hear about things which will frustrate us? If we want to change the world, volunteer time to help people. There are many volunteer opportunities in soup kitchens, building houses, teaching kids, and so much more.
Focus on the bright side of life. I promise – there is always a bright side! What you think about is what you will get. Practice this skill by keeping a gratitude journal.
What we think is what we are. We can fool ourselves in a positive way or in a negative way. We can think ourselves rich and grow rich.
Stop looking in the rear view mirror. Live your life from this day forward.
I would say only look back to learn from mistakes, though don’t dwell on what happened, it already happened. Also to live in the present, and prepare for the future.
A lot of people have told me “you only live once.” People have said this to me many times because I save a lot of the money I make, and the people who say it to me, spend all their money away.
Do you understand why they say it to me? To justify spending everything they earn and more. The reason I save? Because I prefer financial freedom and location freedom over consumption of products.
Think about your priorities. What is important for you? Financial Freedom or the new ______(fill in the blank)?
Posted on January 14th 2010.